Wed, 07 Jun 2017 03:52:49 GMT
The hurt is still here. Will you please make it go away? I close my eyes, breathe, and keep saying, "It will be ok...It will be ok"...and it will...I know. In time.
I know this isn't OZ and I can't make things better by wishing and clicking my heels together. I wish it were that easy.
I want to be sitting on the porch tonight with both Dixie and Peanut.
The night breeze feels so good and Dixie is here chewing her bone, but it is not peaceful. I see visions of Peanut suffocating in my car while clawing to get out. It breaks my heart. Will you just take that part away?
Grieving for him reminds me of other griefs and it builds momentum. Help me to stop it...stop it for me. Don't let me get sucked into that black hole again. I lay my life before you and pray that you will save me from anything that would pull me away. I am fragile, Lord, and my soul easily breaks. I need you so much!
Father, I beg you in the name of Jesus to stop any evil spirit trying to pull me down. Come to my defense, and rescue me from the spiritual enemy who so badly wants my soul. I pray that you will put a hedge of protection around me so that negative thoughts cannot stay in my mind. Rebuke any bad thoughts and help me replace them with good ones.
Father, you are my only defense against the enemy. I totally depend on you and cast all these things at the feet of Jesus who is my high priest and protector.
Father, I believe with all my heart that you are in the process of healing me. I'm reminded of Peter who had the courage to get out of the boat and come to you. You caught him when his faith wavered. I'm about to step out of that same boat and lean totally on you instead of chemicals to make me whole.
I know I can do it, Jesus. I can walk on that water if I keep looking straight at you. I know you will catch me if I start to sink, but I don't believe I will, not if I keep focused on you. Together, we will walk safely to the other side.